idk why ppl find vampires scary. just bite them first. throw them off their game
nothing fills my heart with more violence than the sight of a naked wrapping paper roll
this is how Cain killed Abel
There’s a tornado warning out (two, technically), so of course I went for a walk outside to see if I could spot it. Never have I seen so many of my neighbors at one time, when there wasn’t a firework show or a picnic.
There was a tornado warning and a bunch of people gathered outside to set off fireworks. I wish I was kidding.
How cool would it be to shoot fireworks into a tornado?
Gays not knowing strap means gun and straights not knowing strap means strap on has been the funniest miscommunication on the Internet so far
“Get the strap!”
